Fashion Models:
My Precious Twins

When I was pregnant with my twins, it was not until a sonogram at 5 months that we found out we were going to have twins.

During my entire pregnancy, we were unaware that our girls were, in fact, girls and that they were identical twins.

It was not until the moment of their birth (4 weeks early by C-section) that we were told that we had twin daughters. It was also at that moment that we became aware of how truly special and how truly lucky our girls were.

We would come to learn that our twins were not only identical twins, but the rarest type of identical twins - monoamniotic twins (those twins that share the same amniotic sac and same placenta). The mortality rate is very high for one or both twins when twins are monoamniotic.

We were not aware, during the pregnancy, that our twins were monoamniotic and this was probably a blessing, as they are not only considered very high-risk, but I believe I would have worried myself sick.

Upon their delivery, my doctor found that the girls had tied their unbilical cords in a perfect knot (not uncommon for monoamniotics) and he held the knot up in the air and said, "When these girls get to be 18, you need to take them to Vegas ... because these are lucky girls." After further inspection, my doctor noted that one of the umbilical cords had pulled away from the placenta and was hanging on by only a few blood vessels. If my doctor had not decided to go ahead and "take" the babies that afternoon of April 8, 1992 - we'd have likely lost one and possibly both of our precious twins.

These are my twins when they were five years old. They are telling a secret (who knows what). I love these pictures. I was lucky to catch this moment.

They are much the same now - my precious girls. They are very close and treasure their twinship. I have tried to impress upon them how special this unique relationship is. It is a bond - a kinship - a relationship - a love ... that few people will ever know. Such ... that only twins know. Wouldn't it be wonderful to have that? To have someone that is truly yours. Someone God meant you always to be with, to be near? Someone that will always put you first? Someone that knows your thoughts and desires? Someone that believes in you and laughs at everything you say? Someone that loves you completely and unconditionally?

That is the special bond my girls have. From birth until the day they die - they will always have each other - in a way that only they can appreciate. I have often told them, "This is something that is unique to only a few. It is a gift. Take this gift and cherish it. Never take this gift for granted."

They've gotten to where they call each other "Twin". People get a kick out of this (their teachers and friends), as they think that some twins would rather distract from or dismiss this obvious connection. But ... not my twins. They enjoy it. They are proud of each other.

I like to think that the secret they are telling each other in these photos is, "You are my best friend .... I am lucky to have you and .... I will love you forever."

They are no longer little girls - my twins.

They are young women with strong minds and huge potential.

They are beautiful and smart and kind.

They are loving and filled with laughter and life.

They are a joy to have around.

They are going to fly soon - my girls.

It won't be long ... the time is coming.

My twin daughters are on the rim of our nest.

They haven't jumped off yet - but they are certainly spreading their wings.

They are beginning to feel the breeze.

It won't be long before they take that leap.

And these are not humming birds in my nest ...

No ...

These are majestic eagles.

The day they do fly ...

They will not flutter away ...

They will not go out of here quietly ...

When my eagles fly ...

They will soar!

My greatest fear is not the leap or the possible fall. It is not the technique or the ability. I truly believe I am preparing them for the flight. For the journey into their life. My greatest fear is that ...

they will never come back.

Today is their Birthday.

Today they turn 16 years old.

They are my pride and joy and I love them very much!

Happy Birthday Courtney and Chloe!

Happy 16th Birthday!

Hosted by Cecily and Mama Geek

If you are a sixteen year old girl ...

You might borrow your mother's Canon Rebel XTI ...

To take photos of the world ...

As seen through the eyes of a teenager.

You might take photos of yourself taking photos.

Or of yourself flashing the peace sign.

You would definitely want to take a photo of cool Converse shoes.

You might stand in the bathroom and take pictures of your cute new haircut.

Or pose for a darling portrait.

You should definitely take photos of your friends.

And of peanut butter.

And groovy checkered shoes.

And make sure you sneak into an old graveyard and photograph a couple interesting headstones.

And ... swings hanging lonesome on a porch.

Catch some action shots - for sure!

And a beautiful sunset or two.

And don't forget the zebras.

And the cats named Banana Pancake.

And precious babies with gorgeous eyes of blue.

Play in the meadow and capture photos of your friends.

And lie in the middle of the highway to snap that thrilling danger shot.

Make sure to take some funky angles ...

And capture images that represent who you are.

Take time to be creative.

And don't forget those checkered shoes again - can't have too many pictures of those.

Or of colorful things that remind us of summer.

And rustic images that remind us of good times with friends.

Oh, yes - don't forget the wine for mom.

And the feet.

And the cool shot of the honey bee.

And the girl that makes her mom smile.

Photos taken by Courtney and Chloe

-

I try to be a good mom.

I'm not the best mom and I'm not the worst mom. I'm somewhere in between. In between those moms that take their children lunches to school and eat with them at least once a week and those other moms that send their little ones to school with $1.25 in their pocket to purchase the tray of "yummy" school lunch food (while I've done this too).

Courtney and Chloe make their own lunches for school.

Courtney was quick to point out to me recently that this was not what "good mothers" do for their kids.

She went on and on about how the mother of a friend of hers would not only make her daughter special sandwiches with actual lettuce with the lunch meat - but often include sweet little notes in her specially decorated bags. Sometimes, this same mother will make an extra sandwich for anyone that forgets to bring their lunch (*loser mom throws head back and laughs hysterically - bahahahahahaha*).

She also told me of another mother that prepares these little snack bags (chips, juice box, cookies) and keeps them in her car to hand out to the beggars on the corners that hold up signs that they are homeless.

Okay ... I'm not doing any of these things. No special bags of treats (while a great idea) for the homeless and no lettuce, notes or decorated lunch bags for my teenage daughter's lunches.

I either have too much on my plate, those other mothers have too much time on their hands or something ... somewhere in between.

On the upside ... One day I am going to surprise those girls and make their lunches again - I might just even put actual lettuce on top of that bo-logna! And ... a little note inside their bag that says, "Hey Girly - it's me - Mom. If you don't like this sandwich - maybe you can get that EXTRA ONE from your friend's bag - eat it - and then save this sub-standard sandwich to put in a little gift bag to give to the homeless man on the corner down the street. Bye Sweetie - See you when you get home. Love, Mom."

My kids often have their friends over at our house.

One day, not too long ago, there were six of the girls' basketball friends over and they were all up in Courtney and Chloe's bedroom.

I walked by.

I stuck my head in to say hello.

When I walk in, I see ... one girl on Courtney's bed, two girls on Chloe's bed, two girls on the futon, one girl each sitting in the desk chairs, one girl on the floor and one sprawled out in the recliner near the closet. Some had their shoes off, others had pillows they were clutching, one seemed to actually be sleeping, and ... at least 4 of them had phones in their hands and were busy - like little beavers - text, text, texting away - furiously - as if, whatever they were saying in these text messages were the most interesting and most important information ever to be sent over the telegraph wires (or whatever it's called) - EVER!! Texting - like crazy - at least 4 of these girls.

I saw this craziness and asked, "What are you all doing?"

And pretty much all of them answered, in unison, "Nothin'."

I then asked if anyone needed anything and they answered that they were fine - with looks on most of their faces that indicated that they wanted me to leave.

I put my hand on the door to go and then turned back and asked, "By the way, who are you all talking to?" looking into the eyes of one of my daughters.

And 3 of the girls (including one of my own), looked up quickly in my direction and said, "Each other." And then all --- went immediately back to texting once again.

THEY. WERE. TEXTING. EACH. OTHER!!!!

They were in the very same room!!

They weren't more than 2 feet from each other!

And ... they found this to be perfectly normal!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS CRAZY PICTURE?

On the upside ... This is CRAZINESS - this texting thing! Have you ever seen it in action? Have you ever been around one of these teenagers when they perform this TEXTING? I think it might just be possible that they will soon eliminate talking altogether - they might just get to where they only ever use their computers or the texting on their phones and then they will never actually have to see any of their friends face to face or ever speak a single verbal word to any of them.

Hummmm ... maybe I need to learn this texting thing - start communicating non-verbally with my teenage daughters! Holy What-Took-Me-So-Long-To-See-The-Potential Batman ... Now that there's a brilliant idea!

Alexis opened one of her Christmas presents from Mom and Dad.

She removed the tissue paper from the box and excitedly pulled out a darling jogging outfit (pants and a zippered hoody). It had shiny emblems on the lapel and on the backside of the pant bottoms and it was the lovely shade of pale teal.

Alexis was very excited and said, "I love it. I love this color - this is my favorite color."

I smiled.

Alexis smiled back sweetly at her Mama.

Chloe looked at Courtney, with a smirk on her can't-wait-to-come-up-with-a-sarcastic-remark-teenage-face and said, "What ... grayish teal?" questioning Alexis' enthusiasm over this color.

Courtney, whose wheels are turning now - in her equally-sarcastic-teenage-pea-sized-brain then says, "What ... the color of dead pond water?" and they laugh into each other's faces obnoxiously.

Then, the quick witted Chloe quickly banters back, "What ... the color of bread mold?" and now the two hysterical teenage comedians have thrown their heads back and spit is flying everywhere from all of their rowdy laughter.

And now Courtney's mind is really racing and immediately she says, "What ... like the color of extinct Brontosaurus'?" and she lies down sideways on the couch, laughing so hard she can barely catch her breath.

Chloe, who can not believe how funny she and her sister are, and this is apparent by the way they keep giving each other pokes on the shoulders or exaggerated high-fives, says, "What ... like the color of a decaying sea turtle?" and then falls to the floor, holding her stomach and wipes at the tears running down her face.

Me ... I'm sitting across the room, drinking my coffee as I am watching this episode of Comedy Central and just rolling my eyes.

The darling Alexis, sitting in the middle of the floor, has long since folded her lovely new jogging suit back into its box and has moved onto her next Christmas present -- never once picking up on the ridiculous meanness being hurled at her by her two loving sisters. She loves this new teal jogging suit and has declared that it will be the outfit she will wear for the day.

On the upside ... Sometimes those twins are funny and then sometimes ... they are ... Just. Plain. Stupid.

After the game, I returned home, changed into my PJ's and climbed up on my bed to relax and watch a little TV.

About an hour into my leisurely break, my peace and quiet was abruptly disrupted when ... 2 very loud teenage girls - 2 basketball playin', game winning, girls - returned home, excitedly from their game.

They ran up the stairs like two elephants (*clomp, clomp, clomp, clomp, clomp*) and I could hear them in the hallway, beyond my closed door, racing and pushing each other, trying to get to my room before the other. They threw open my door, flung their sweaty, jersey covered bodies onto my nice clean bed and began to talk - real fast - over each other's words - about all the stuff that happened during this very exciting game ... the same game I just came from, mind you. But ... I listened.

Then ... as the excitement was winding down and the conversation hit a lull, they both stood up and were standing next to each other beside my bed - fixing to leave my room. Suddenly, Courtney looks at Chloe, very seriously and says, "Does your uvula ... ever get stuck?" Then she starts to make these exaggerated kak-kak-kaking noises (*hairball sound*) and points to her throat.

Chloe starts to laugh and says, "Y-eah," she bends at the waist and slaps her hand on her knee because her sister is so funny.

"It gets stuck (*kak-kak-kaking noise again*)," Courtney goes on and on and her sister is now also making the noise and they are laughing like crazy hyenas.

I am confused.

I am not sure what a uvula is, but I am pretty sure that it is ... a female b.o.d.y p.a.r.t and I am too embarrassed to ask and too a.f.r.a.i.d to ask.

They must have seen the confusion on my face, because Courtney then says, "That punching bag thing in the back of your throat, " and continues to giggle and kak-kak, "Sometimes I have to reach my tongue back there to un-stick it," she demonstrates what this technique looks like (it was not a pretty sight).

On the upside ... U.vu.la, n. pl. -las, lae - the fleshy, conical body projecting downward from the soft palate. --- still sounds like something dirty to me. Uvula, uvula, uvula - now I know what it is and I will never use this word again, as it makes me uncomfortable - I will use punching bag thingy - that makes more sense anyways.

(Note to self: Never, ever, ever, ever, ever ... Google uvula again!! It will gross you out!)

I am sitting at the kitchen table.

In front of me is my Arby's Chicken Salad Sandwich, with the grapes and nuts in it (that I love) and my french fries and Coke.

To my right is my daughter, Courtney, with her Roast Beef Sandwich, fries and Iced Tea.

Across the table is my daughter, Chloe, with her Roast Beef Sandwich, that she meticulously opened, slathered with several ounces of Arby's sauce, closed back up, and is shoving into her mouth.

We begin to talk - me and these two 15 year old, basketball-jersey-wearin', mouth smackin', loud speakin', pony-tail wearin', laugh-at-every-ridiculous-thing, rough around the edges ... teenage, girls.

We talk a bit about this.

We talk a bit about that.

I am in heaven, savoring every bite of my delicious sandwich (have you had this sandwich??), looking up only every so often at my darling girl's faces as they cram these Roast Beef sandwiches into their mouths - pieces of roast beef hanging off the sides of their lips, chewed up globs inside their mouths I'd rather not see, spit flying as they try to get all their stories out of their mouths at the same time they are shoving food in ... I have to divert my eyes, so as to not throw-up my delicious Chicken Salad sandwich and yummy fries.

Then ... as I am eating (like a civilized human being, mind you), looking across the table at the one cow-like-child ...... out of the corner of my eye, I see Courtney ... lower her head slowly to the square of Arby's paper that is her plate for her sandwich droppings, fries, crumbs and slobber ... position her ant-eater-like-mouth around a piece of roast beef that has fallen out of her sandwich and then ... SUCK IT UP - ssssshhhhllllllllluuuurrrrrrrp - like an animal on National Geographic.

I just look at her.

In amazement.

She sees that I saw her ... bend over, ever so deliberately and precisely position her mouth right over this hunk of meat, open her jaws, inhale ... and SUCK IT UP ... and she begins to laugh!

I can't take my eyes off of her.

I begin to laugh.

Because I can.

Because ... these are not my children.

I don't know where my adorable little, bows-in-their-curly-hair, ruffles around their socks, Mary Jane wearin', doll-playin' ... sweet, eat like young ladies ... girls went, but ... they were not sittin' at this table with me - enjoying this delicious Arby's meal. No they were not.

On the upside ... This is yet another area I have failed as a mother - manners and food etiquette. At the rate I am going ... I will definitely reach 100% failure. That has got to be some sort of record. I will probably get an award - be written about in newspaper articles, be called as a guest for the Oprah show. 100% ... it won't be long now.

If I am to you ...

What you are to me ...

Then there is ...

laughter.

If you see in me ...

What I see in you ...

Then there is ...

hope.

If you lean on me ...

Like I lean on you ...

Then there is ...

strength.

If you feel for me ...

What I feel for you ...

Then there is ...

love.

If there was no me ...

Or there was no you ...

Then ...

we ...

would ...

not ...

be ...

complete.

-

These are my twins when they were five years old. They are telling a secret (who knows what). I love these pictures. I was lucky to catch this moment.

They are much the same now - my precious girls. They are very close and treasure their twinship. I have tried very hard to impress upon them how special this unique relationship is and one of the things I am most proud of is that I did it in such a way (apparently) that they believe it. I can't say that for everything I have tried to teach them - but if they got this one thing - that's something.

Twins are a strange phenomenon. People find them fascinating. I believe they are God's way of saying, "You want to see a miracle - look at this." My twins are a miracle. All twins are miracles.

I love that my twins love each other. I don't think I taught them this and that is why it is so special. You can't make someone love another person. They just do - truly.

It is a bond - a kinship - a relationship - a love ... that few people will ever know. Such ... that only twins know. Wouldn't it be wonderful to have that? To have someone that is truly yours. Someone God meant you always to be with, to be near? Someone that will always put you first? Someone that knows your thoughts and desires? Someone that believes in you and laughs at everything you say? Someone that loves you completely and unconditionally?

That is the bond my girls have. From birth until the day they die - they will always have each other - in a way that only they can appreciate. I have often told them, "This is something that is unique to only a few. It is a gift. Take this gift and cherish it. Never take this gift for granted."

They are 15 years old now. They've gotten to where they call each other "Twin". People get a kick out of this (their teachers), as they think that some twins would rather distract from or dismiss this obvious connection. But ... not my twins. They enjoy it. They are proud of each other.

I like to think that the secret they are telling each other in these photos is, "You are my best friend .... I am lucky to have you and .... I will love you forever."

When my twins were born (15 years ago), I was elated. I was so in love and infatuated, I would often write love poems to them. Some of these poems hung on the walls of their nursery. The first poem I ever wrote was:

A GIFT

When babies are born ...
God is pleased

He looks down from his thrown
Down from above
And he speaks ...

These children ...
I give to you

These children ...
A gift for you

Care for them
And hold them
Teach them
And mold them
Love them ...
And bring happiness into their lives

Because ... for now
These children are yours

But one day ...
I will want them back

They will come to me ...
They will sit next to me ...
And we will talk

Be proud
Feel honored
For I have chosen you ...
Above all others ...
To be the mother
Of these precious twins.

On their first birthday, this is the poem I wrote:

KNOW THIS

Dear Girls,

One year ago today ...
You were born

Two little angels
Out of the heavens
Into my arms

You were one
That became two
We were two
That became so much more

When I look at you
I know that God truly must love me

When you look at me
From now, until forever more
Know this ...

I have often looked to heaven ...
I have knelt to my knees before God ...
I have prayed ...

Thank you God ... I love them very much

Love, Your Mother

I wanted to share this ... because they are now 15 years old (my angels) and the time is slipping away.