It hasn't happened in a long while.
I don't know why, exactly ... but, I have had a reprieve.
I have enjoyed its absence.
I have appreciated the break.
But ...
It did not last.
It was too good to be true.
It was bound to happen again ... eventually.
I was at church recently, sitting with an old friend.
My mother was there.
My friend's sister was there.
My friend's sister's ... beautiful, youthful, twenty-something, daughter - the one with the porcelain complexion, silky, long dark brown hair, pearly white smile, slender, beautiful body, giggly stories - Yes ... she was there, as well.
I sat in a pew next to my dear friend.
My friend's sister and the goddess-like daughter were in the pew right behind us.
My mother sat in the pew behind them.
There was no one else in the chapel and we had gathered to talk.
My friend's niece began to tell a darling story about her little son.
We listened.
We giggled.
We laughed.
"How old is he now?" I asked - remembering this boy when he was only a baby. Remembering the niece when she was just a baby. Realizing at that moment ... that she was STILL ONLY A MERE BABY!
"Oh ..." she smiled so big, "He's 7 years old," she gushed with pride.
"I can't believe that!" I exclaimed - this comment we all say when we hear about a child we haven't seen for long while.
"Yes," she explained, "He's seven now."
I hesitated.
I hem-hawed.
I debated with myself for a moment.
Then, I said ...
"My Alexis is six," the words came out of my mouth at the same time my brain said, 'Keep quiet. Keep it to yourself - you fool - you are OLD - she is a child - she is a goddess-child with a 7 year old son. She will never understand. It will likely blow her mind. She's liable to faint or have spasms or ... GAG'!
But ... I said it.
I did.
And ...
I sat there and waited.
We all waited.
She got this strangled look on her face and then she muttered, "Wwwhat?" with a startled hesitation in her voice.
Had she heard it right?
Could it be possible?
Surly not!
"Yes ... I have Alexis - who is 6. I mention it because your story ..." I keep talking, but I see that she is clearly in shock, "Was so cute and I know how they are - 6 year olds - so cute," I ramble.
Then ...
Once she heard me ...
Really HEARD me ...
This goddess-child ---- the one with the shiny hair, porcelain complexion, pearly white smile, slender, youthful body ---- the one with a child one year older than mine ---- (ME ---- the elderly, aging friend of her Aunt M ---- the one not quite yet in need of a walker or a hearing aid, but ancient, nonetheless) ... she ... opens her eyes real big and ...
She GASPS!
Like people do when they hear or see something ... shocking!
Like people do when they hear or see something ... hideous!
Like people do when they are a struck by ... fear!
That sort of GASP!
The sort of GASP ---- where the person just instinctively SUCKS in a bunch of air - no words - only that G-A-S-P sound.
You know.
YEP!
It. Was. Hysterical!
And ...
It didn't hurt my feelings.
It didn't even surprise me.
It ... made me ...
THROW MY HEAD BACK AND LET OUT A LAUGH SO SPONTANEOUS AND INFECTIOUS - We all began to cackle right there in the chapel in the very front pews.
She, of course, began to try to back-pedal herself out of this moment, but it was too late.
I said, "I know ---- it's just not right," and we laughed some more.
On the upside ... Just about the time I am perfectly happy, strolling along, living in my I'm-too-old-to-haven't-had-any-"Are-you-the-grandma?"-comments-in-a-long-while-so-I-must-be-looking-younger DELUSIONAL world ... A perfectly darling, young goddess-child-with-a-7 year old ... comes along ... and pushes me right back down in my rickety rocking chair and hands me a cup of tea and and afghan to throw across my feeble legs.