When I was a young girl ...
I was never very tall.
I was skinny and small.
I didn't have particularly great hair.
I didn't have particularly clear skin.
I didn't have gorgeous long legs or fluffy long eyelashes.
I was normal.
And ...
Flat chested.
Oh ... not as flat as some, but ...
A lot flatter than I would have liked.
I often wore padded bras.
I often did chest exercises ---
We must ...
We must ...
We must ...
Increase our ...
BUST!
You know the one!
Also ...
I often ...
Stuffed my bra with ...
TOILET PAPER!
Nothing really helped.
I still KNEW I was flat chested.
I still KNEW I had no boobies.
I still WANTED ...
BIGGER ...
ROUNDER ...
BOOBS!
When I grew up ---
I had 4 babies.
Still ---
A bit larger, but ...
Not BIG ENOUGH!
I'm now into my 40's.
I have boobies now.
Now what I want is ...
To get rid of these ...
Always-in-my-way-makin'-me-look-fatter-than-I-really-am-attract-my-husband-way-more-often-than-I-myself-am-actually-ever-really-interested-in-sex ... JUGS!
On the upside ... I know I can't do it - but, if I could ... I'd go back in time and tell my 13 year old self to ...
STOP DREAMING! DON'T SPEND THE MONEY! When you get to be 40 something - you won't care quite as much and ... you really need to consider buying yourself a sporty convertible instead because ... you will never believe it, but ... you will be TRAPPED driving a VAN for 16 years or more, hauling 4 kids from here to kingdom come and ... no matter what you do ... those big ol' boobs will not look cool or sexy or VOLUPTUOUS ... in the sweats and t-shirts you wear most often and they will NEVER look HOT ... in a BIG BLUE VAN!
(*They will look pretty darn good at the lake, though - in a picture your youngest daughter takes of your boobs ... instead of your face*)
*Note - To those new readers that have come to my site to read this post through Stumble Upon - welcome! And ... thanks for coming by. While you are here ... I hope you will take time to read some of my other posts - I'd love to share my stories with you. If you like my site - please subscribe to my site in your reader, as I post new stories daily and would be honored if you came back again . I'd also appreciate a thumbs up on this post if you liked it - thanks - Kellan