The other night, as I was turning out his light and walking out of his room, Little Billy said to me, "Night Mom. I'll love you forever and more."
I turned back, walked over to his bed and I gave him a big hug and said, "Me too - forever and more!"
He is so sweet - my boy.
We were at his football awards ceremony recently and he said, while sitting at a picnic table eating our pizza, "When am I going to make my Christmas list to send to Santa (Christmas being 9 days away)?"
I was surprised. It was odd timing and there were some of his football buddies nearby - I was surprised by the question and that he asked it where one of his buddies might very well hear it. I said, "Well ... I already made your list - I sent Santa the list of things you told me you wanted - along with Alexis' and the girls' lists. I had to send them - gotta get the list there, you know."
He looked confused. "What did you put on my list?" he was so serious.
"Well - I put some of the things that you have been telling me that you wanted. The list has been sent," I said, trying to discourage him from now trying to add anything more to this list - as I have BOUGHT all of his gifts already ;)
He then says, "How does Santa get this list - all those letters?"
This is my 10 year old son - who I had figured really doesn't believe in Santa anymore, but has just been keeping that information to himself, as kids do, in order to ensure that he will still be getting gifts from the Jolly Fella. And yet, here he was asking me this question ... so seriously. And it occurs to me that he is not smiling. He is not joking - he wants to know - for real.
So, I say, "Well ... they take them up there - to the North Pole. I guess they have some place they deliver them - like a special box or house or something and then Santa sends someone for them. I don't know, really. I think there is some magic involved - like ... the letters just vanish and end up in Santa's hands (*mom stumbling for a plausible story - not doing a very good job - sheesh*). I think it's kind of like God," I said, and then re-thunk that comment and said, "But, not really."
He listened to all of this crap I was spewing and then said, "I just hope you put all the right stuff on my list."
Well, okay.
On the upside ... I honestly didn't know that he still believed in Santa. I loved that he still does believe in Santa. I loved that he is still so innocent and sweet and just a little boy ... that still believes in Santa. I was so sure he wasn't much of any of those things - anymore. I was wrong and I was so pleased. He was so sweet and at that moment he was totally dependent on me to keep this Christmas fantasy going - for him. I loved that I could do that for him - it was truly a magical moment because ... it will surly be the last time he honestly believes. I loved that he was still wide-eyed and curious and ... I loved that I underestimented his imagination and his innocence. I loved that ... for a while longer ... he is still my little boy.