So ...
There are a few things of which I am acutely aware ...
There are many things I don't know a thing about, but some things - I am completely certain of.
One of the things I know ...
Without a doubt ...
For sure ...
Ab-so-lutely ...
Is ...
I
Am
Not
The
Best
Mother.
There -
I've said it!
I *whisper* this statement just because - I know this ... but, I don't necessarily want or need others to know this!
I know this!
I've known this for a while.
I knew this years ago - practically back to the very beginning of the - beginning.
I don't need people to tell me this.
I don't need nods of disapproving heads.
I don't need the rolling of disgusted eyes.
I don't need the shrugs of judgemental shoulders ...
To tell me this.
I know this.
And ...
I don't need anyone to come to my house - sit next to Alexis - smell her stinky feet from well across the couch - and say ...
"This child needs a bath tonight."
As if to impress that "this child" does not take regular baths!
I will likely lose my temper at such a statement.
While I know that these stinky feet might very well indicate that "the child" needs a bath and ... it is even likely that "the child" is long overdue for a bath ...
I will still ...
Likely ...
Lose my temper over such a statement.
I will be offended.
I will snap and snarl and screech retaliatory comments like ...
"Like ... I never give her a bath?"
"Is that what you are trying to imply?"
"How would you know how often I give her a bath?"
"Are you here in my house every single day?"
"I. Don't. Think. So!"
"You couldn't possibly know how often she has a bath?"
"Plus ... how often is often enough - anyway?"
"I could give 'the child' 3 baths a day and that would still not be often enough."
"What is often enough?"
"What?"
"WHAT?"
Yes ...
Even us rotten mothers ...
The ones that are completely aware of our inadequacies ...
The ones that strive and strive and strive, but never seem to measure up to June Cleaver and never will ...
Are still prepared ...
And even good at ...
B.i.t.i.n.g your head off ...
If you even try to imply ...
That ...
We ...
Suck at ...
This ... motherhood thing!
On the upside ... Sorry mom. *slithers off to the bathroom to run bath for stinky 7 year old daughter*
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